DadTalk

Building up to birth

Things to consider when preparing for the birth of your child

Where to have your baby?

At home, is my first response, if all is well with mother and baby and no problems are anticipated. I must confess though that I am somewhat biased as I have had the privilege of attending many births in the home environment. Unfortunately the NHS has done little to encourage home births until recent times as it was believed that having your baby in hospital, where doctors and equipment are at the ready, was safer.

The reality is that research now shows that hospital births are no safer for mothers and babies, in the absence of risk factors. It can be argued that a healthy woman coming into hospital can be more susceptible to acquiring infection and be more likely to have intervention in labour. All I am asking of you is to not rule this option out until you have spoken to your midwife and discussed the options available to you both.  

If after discussion you choose to have a hospital birth you may wish to consider the maternity units locally to you. The BirthChoiceUK website provides normal birth and Caesarean section rates which may be useful when deciding where you choose to give birth.

Research what antenatal education is available and try to source classes which others have benefitted from. Do not be afraid to ask what exactly is covered in the sessions as well planned and prepared classes will be able to provide this information for you. Go along not just for your partners’ sake but also for your benefit. You may not realise it now but you may be the only one who is around to help support her, for example, when she is struggling to breastfeed. It is a well known fact, although not evidenced based, that women lose some brain cells during childbirth, and your ability to remember what advice you were given on positioning and attaching the baby may be just the support she needs to get things back on track. 

These sessions are primarily an opportunity to receive information that will help support you and your partner in making informed choices but an added benefit is that they can be opportunity for the women to meet others in the same situation and build friendships - very valuable!

All that is necessary for a new baby’s needs is somewhere to sleep, a car seat, clothing, nappies and a mummy to feed. Everything else is an extra and I would encourage you to consider second hand items. Look out for NCT nearly new sales in your area. (However, note that car seats should not be acquired second hand unless you can be absolutely sure that they have not been damaged in any way.)  

In today’s media led market you could be convinced into spending hundreds of pounds on items for the baby. An example is when I hear parents have bought a steriliser, bottles and formula milk, ‘JUST IN CASE’.

“Just in case of what?” I ask. I am forever dumbfounded that there is any doubt of the mother or baby’s ability to breastfeed. The reality is virtually all women and babies can breastfeed with the correct support advice and information. The majority of problems occur mainly through lack of knowledge and poor advice.

The internet is a great resource and I would recommend the Department of Health’s website for links to all you need to know. In particular - ‘The Pregnancy Book’ is an easy format with up to date advice and information. You should have received a copy form your midwife but it is updated each year and available to download from the Department of Health web-site

Enjoy your time as a new Dad - remember you are important too, keep asking questions, be ready to help out as needed & get as many cuddles as you can!